Obama’s farts help neutralize industrial pollutants.
Obama once fed 5000 Chicago villagers with only 10 foodstamps
If you play basketball with Barack Obama, doctors will find traces of Hope and Change in your urine.
Barack Obama is the only force in the universe that can make Stephen Colbert shave his head (literally-watch it on you-tube)
3rd world sweatshops are only sweating because they anticipate a visit from Barack Obama.
The mentioning of Obama gets white bachelorette parties more excited than 10 “Journey” songs in a row.
Obama’s cigarette smoke cures lung cancer
Barack Obama can singlehandedly re-unite the original Guns n’ Roses band. Just give him a few more days.
Oliver Stone will be directing an epic film about Obama starring Tom Hanks
Sean Hannity gets a secret tickle sensation whenever he hears Obama speaking. He can’t understand why and has never told a soul about it.
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